Thursday, 18 July 2013

Coulda Should Woulda

The word should makes me laugh, what does it even mean?

 should  /SHo͝od/
Verb: Used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness, typically when criticizing someone's actions: "he should have been careful".
Indicating a desirable or expected state: "by now students should be able to read".

See? It means nothing particularly apart from to argue with reality, and what is ever the point of that unless you want to give yourself a headache or heart attack!
If we take the above dictionary example "he should have been more careful" we can assume that there are consequences for not taking enough care. Well okay, but let’s keep in present time (because that’s where our power exists) and deal with the consequences of not taking enough care instead of drowning in the story of "shoulds".

 He obviously didn't take enough care so that's it, that's the experience, there isn't any "should of" it simply doesn't exist. We can't change the experience we can only change the story we tell ourselves about it, so free yourself up by choosing to only deal with the reality. I was at a workshop with Byron Katie recently and she reminded everyone again that if you argue with reality you lose, but only 100% of the time!

Another exhausting example of "should” I hear over and over is "I should really be doing X Y or Z"
The reality is that you are not actually doing X Y or Z, so either give yourself a permission break and actually enjoy what you are doing/being in this present moment, or just get on with X Y Z, because if you're junking up your inner dialogue in the present with future got-to's, you're not fully present anyway, you're not experiencing a peaceful mind.

In my marriage education training, my teacher Tony Robbins pointed out over and over, that people say their partners "should" this and they "should" that, in fact they "should" all over themselves far too much! We need to stop "shoulding" all over ourselves and our relationships.

So of course I'm not saying you "should"  :-)   but I invite you to drop "should" from your vocabulary for a while and experience how freeing it feels for you and those around you.  Dawn 

Monday, 15 July 2013

I was just thinking...

Every movement, every emotion, how we experience, comes from thought.

We think ourselves how to be and how to do.

We can think consciously, with focus and awareness.

We can often run old thinking programs from our subconscious without realizing it.

Our stress is stressful because of the story we're thinking and running about it.

We don't have to believe everything we think.

Whatever you decide to think, your brain will find references to prove you right over and over. Your subconscious will be creating experiences to show you, whether it's feels pleasant or not.

Without believing stressful thought, we're more open; we hear and see with more clarity, we’re more understanding, less judgemental, more open and loving.

Freedom comes when we shift our thinking.

We can think a new think any time we like.